#how to woo a bard

[0dde11eth]

Geralts determined to start his wooing of the bard. Unfortunately he doesn't have any clues how to do this.

So they give geralt an ear piece so eskel can whisper tips into geralts ear. It has... mixed results

Eskel: Start with a compliment. Tell him he looks slim

Geralt: you seem malnourished. Are you suffering from internal parasites?

Jaskier: .... 0.0 what!?!

Eskel: change of plan ask him about his day

Geralt: how was your day

Jaskier: thanks for asking. We'll first I woke up and then ....

Geralt: look now he won't stop talking

Eskel: that's normal. Just nod and go uh huh.

Geralt: uh huh uh huh *nodding*

Jaskier: and then you asked me to supper and now I'm here.

Geralt: *nodding*hmm

Jaskier: oh and geralt? Tell eskel I say hi

Geralt and eskel: *panicked noises*

Jaskier: next time don't steal Lamberts gaming headphones with the attached microphone

[coffeecakecafe]

Me? Joining a new dnd game?? Of course yeah

Magpie is for a Dragonlance campaign I’ve been invited to!

[littleblondesoprano]

Brain just made the cutest god damn DnD character of a lil halfling bard that is also an incessant tinkerer/incidental inventor (less Gipetto/Maurice and more Mad Scientist) and perfectionist. She plays the lute and wants to try and make an amp for it.

[0dde11eth]

Geralt bought those flowers for Jaskier. Roach approves the match but is still a little shit

Jaskier eats one of her toy Mouses while maintaining eye contact to establish that he shall not be pushed around

(Geralts staying out of their weird power play)

[fangirleaconmigo]

Geralt x Jaskier Geraskier First kiss, friends to lovers

Geraskier Dancing

When Geralt of Rivia was a child, he begged Vesemir to teach him the kind of dances they performed at court. The answer was always no, but he kept trying.

After the trials, when Vesemir seemed so affected by his eyes, Geralt would widen them and look up at his tutor, pleading.

After all, Geralt thought, what if he rescued a fair maiden, and she demanded that he accompany her to a party? Perhaps she would drag him, giggling and flushed, onto the dance floor. He would be her noble savior, and she would be his grateful maiden.

He didn’t tell Vesemir his reasoning of course. He said that it might be important for royal courts, with kings in them. Wouldn’t it be best if he could fit in? Fencing was similar to dance, so surely Vesemir could handle teaching it.

Vesemir sighed and gave him the same speech he always gave.

"Geralt. You are not training to be a knight. Put that out of your mind. You are a professional. A working man.

Further, you are a mutant now. You will not be greeted with gratitude. You will be lucky to be greeted with the cash that you are promised."

Geralt felt stubborn. Furious. But he knew when to drop the subject.

Vesemir would pat his shoulder and offer him a sweet bread. His eyes always held regret.

Geralt understood him now. After years of hard lessons, he understood. When he thought back on his youth, he felt like a dolt.

The women he saved were traumatized. He was meeting them during the most terrified, violent moments of their lives. They screamed, bled, and threw up. And they all ran. With his bloody sword and ashen skin, he looked little different from the monsters he fought.

At least to them.

And yet?

He still learned how to dance, despite having given up the dream.

It started with Jaskier of course, like most misadventures and novel undertakings. The young bard had just shown up in his life one day and sort of just...never left.

His enthusiasm, energy, and optimism infected Geralt's life, as did the handsome twinkle in his eyes.

One night, after several glasses of wine they shared their most ridiculous childhood dreams. Jaskier admitted that he wanted to publicly rub his success in his family's face, to make their rejection sting less. So Geralt admitted that he'd always stupidly wanted to woo a grateful damsel on a dance floor.

He thought they were just talking nonsense, so he was startled when suddenly, Jaskier was on his feet, woozy and holding out a hand.

"C'mon. Lesgo." Jaskier jerked his curly, disheveled head towards an empty spot on the tavern large enough maybe for one large man.

Geralt refused at first. It was silly. Besides, They were both men. Who would lead?

But Jaskier simply grabbed his hand. When they touched, Geralt found that all of his resistance dissipated like a magic spell. He found himself standing and allowing himself to be dragged. And after they moved a few tables, he found himself touching the small of Jaskier's back and swaying with him.

Why didn't it feel odd? It should have felt odd.

It probably felt fine because they were alone.

They always danced alone.

They would be in a bar that was emptying out, the last drunkards stumbling home. Jaskier would be inviting, leaning against him, words slightly slurring.

Geralt selfishly loved him like that, not because Jaskier would lose his inhibitions, but because Geralt would. Plausible deniability.

"No one is here, Geralt. You won't ruin your fearsome rep--rep--pox on it. People won't see you." Jaskier waved dismissively as he dragged him.

The bard's lips grew pinker when he drank, and his cheeks flushed when they danced.

So Geralt let himself be led into the middle of empty bars, dance halls, and sometimes even just under the stars near a campfire.

"Y'need this for" *hiccup* "d'plomacy." Jaskier tugged him this way and that.

Despite the slurring, Jaskier always moved gracefully, like a swan. He'd sing to himself, lost in the music, touching Geralt with surety, guiding him. His body would be warm and little puffs of his wine soaked breath would drift towards Geralt. The witcher would inhale and try to control the surge of something primal in him awakening from a terribly long slumber.

Jaskier always led.

"I thought you were teaching me to dance with ladies," Geralt complained playfully one night. Jaskier was leading him in a lazy circle under some street lanterns on an abandoned street. Trash and litter was everywhere, left over from the spring festival. Their feet crunched on discarded candy wrappers as they moved.

"I am," Jaskier huffed indignantly, eyes hazy. "You must charm these noble ladies. It's not easy, you know. You must practice."

Geralt bit the side of his mouth trying not to smile. He didn't want to ruin the moment. He was so close to Jaskier, the closest he ever got to stand. "But I'm not learning to lead."

"Oh, s'fine. You'll just," Jaskier gestured, twirling his hand in a circle, "turn it all round." Then it was a rolling motion. "Flip it. Change it backwards. You know what I mean. They'll love it."

It was quiet for a moment, Geralt turned his head and crept closer, so he could secretly smile to himself.

"You already complain they simper around me," he murmured near his friend's ear. "You want to make it worse?"

Jaskier snorted loudly. "They're just trying to get to me, Geralt, you know that. Price of fame!!"

Then he spun Geralt, and all the while, Geralt grumbled, purposely moving stubbornly. "I don't twirl, Jaskier."

Jaskier was wobbly and dismissive. "Y'doing great."

Geralt really did learn during those nights. But they never spoke of it in the morning. Those nights were sacred and untouchable lest they shattered in the light of day.

But one day, they finally, truly paid off.

Geralt wanted to run and tell Vesemir. He'd been right. He had needed to learn the skill after all.

Because one spring day he rescued a beautiful young woman, and she was grateful. She was lovely, truly. Her auburn hair cascaded down her back, caressing her delicate waist.

She had been menaced by a werewolf and run screaming into Geralt's arms, invitation to a ball at the ready. It was just like in his youthful dreams.

The werewolf wasn't such a bad guy to be honest. His name was Gil. And he wasn't so much menacing her as he was trying to say hello and simultaneously coughing. But it was an unpleasant sound to be sure. It was a hacking cough.

Geralt had intervened, having been sent there on an errand by Jaskier. The witcher took Gil aside to speak to him. The werewolf was moving on, anyway. He'd just come to see a picnic of beautiful women that Jaskier had told him about, thinking he would say hello.

Geralt wanted to shake Jaskier. Gently of course. To tell his friend that yes, he had needed help with dancing, but certainly did not need help with finding ladies to rescue. They were lying about everywhere there were monsters. Jaskier wasn't around though, he was nervously flitting around at fittings and lute tunings, preparing anxiously for the dance.

It was silly of course.

And to be honest, the young woman hadn't needed much rescuing. Gil's nose was still sore where she had hit him with her bag.

But nonetheless, when she'd seen Geralt she'd sighed and pretended to be quite helpless.

Geralt carried her to safety on Roach, and she had invited him to a dance that night. They were in Lettenhove, and the dance would be packed with nobles. It was the perfect setup.

Geralt got ready with trembling fingers. He laced on his best armor and slicked down his hair. His stomach was weak just to think of it.

When Geralt arrived, the maiden was there in a stunning gown. She arrived breathlessly, ready for her dance. She batted her eyes and curtseyed.

Geralt bowed slightly, and led her onto the dance floor. After a few moments, her raptured attention began to cool. She was well educated and polite, but Geralt caught her regretful glances towards the handsome young nobles in the corner.

He didn't blame her. He was not a small man, and he was stepping on her toes.

The bloom was very quickly off the rose for the young maiden.

"I'm sorry. My mistake." Geralt muttered at every wrong turn.

If you had asked Geralt as a child, whether the disappointment of a maiden would sting, he would have imagined so.

But it didn't. This was not what he had come for. This was not why his stomach had done somersaults as he had laced on his armor. It was because this party was not just packed with nobles, but very particular nobles from a very specific family.

Geralt glanced up to find him.

Jaskier stood off to the side, close by, clutching a glass of wine, and staring daggers at his cousin across the room. His cousin was a handsome man, if you went in for that kind of thing, though not as handsome as Jaskier. But he was holding court with several ladies.

Geralt excused himself with the relieved young lady who tried to look as though she were not fleeing.

Geralt came up behind Jaskier, and touched his back.

Jaskier did not jump or startle. He must have known Geralt's touch and scent by now. He simply turned and smiled.

"You're here!" Jaskier looked behind him. "And Juliet?"

Geralt shrugged. "I never actually learned to lead."

Jaskier's face fell. "I'm sorry, I-" he looked mortified, "-I don't actually know how to teach dance. I only know how to dance. I was just-"

Geralt cut him off by pulling him into his arms with an 'oof'.

Jaskier startled, leaning eagerly into the embrace. But then he remembered himself and looked around cautiously.

"I don't care if they see," Geralt whispered. "I want them to. Let the miserable bastards gossip until their throats are sore."

The widest, brightest grin he had ever seen blossomed on his handsome bard's face. "Well then." Jaskier straightened his shoulders and cleared a catch in his throat. Let me do this properly."

The bard gently detangled himself from Geralt's arms. Then he bowed at the waist and held out a hand. "Geralt of Rivia? May I have this dance?"

Geralt nodded and straightened his jacket. "You may, Viscount Julian of Lettenhove."

Jaskier held his hand with both of his, but he shook his head and whispered. "No. Viscount Julian is theirs. I am Jaskier. I am yours."

Geralt's heart melted. He did not know how to cope with that, so he just nodded.

The music fell silent, and a new song began.

The witcher and the bard were the first couple out on the floor. It may have started as a way to help Jaskier rub his success in his family's eyes. But almost instantly they forgot all about that. They lost themselves in the movement, the laughter, they only saw each other.

But Jaskier's family saw. His mother. His father. His envious cousins. They all saw that he was loved. That he was talented, famous, and loved.

Geralt didn't think a whole lot about Vesemir that night.

He simply danced. And when the last note on the last song died out, he touched Jaskier's chin. His love's eyes lit up with hope. Geralt didn't want to draw out the suspense, so he pulled him in for a kiss. It was tender and they were sweaty, their hearts beating in their chests.

It felt right. And not because they were alone. It was because they loved each other.

When Geralt visited Vesemir during the winter, he brought up his childhood dream. He would tell the old witcher that he understood now.

Love wasn't something you earned through daring acts. It wasn't something you extracted from terrified women as the price for their safety.

Love was a bard who tried his damndest to fulfill your dreams at the expense of his own.

Love was taking him in your arms and fulfilling his.

Well, Geralt tried to say all that. Perhaps it didn't come out the way he meant. Perhaps he stumbled over his words and grunted some.

But when he pulled Jaskier into the room to introduce him to Vesemir, the old witcher understood.

[tygoii]

Innocent Aether x Mage Afab! Reader x Sub Venti

Warnings: Clueless Aether, Dom Reader!, Giving and receiving, Creampie, Virgin Sub Aether, Jealous and Sub Venti!, Flirty Reader, use of anemo power (Venti’s part), Edging Venti

❦

Venti

You were a powerful mage traveling teyvat you were in Mondstadt visiting a certain bard every time you visited the bard would be wooing over you he would always be a blushing, stuttering mess when you flirt with him telling him how cute he looks you of course know his secret and you’ve seen his archon form ‘your so small and cute venti you would look even cuter in my bed all fucked up babbling nonsense begging for more’ the bard’s face would be the color of a crimson agate.

Today you were visiting Mondstadt again you were dressed in a quite revealing outfit since the weather was 80 degrees you were greeted by the guards in front of the gate “Oh Y/n welcome back” said a girl with blonde hair and blue eyes “Hello Barbara how’s the church?” said Y/n smiling “Well..After the fight ended with dvalin the traveler gave back the holy lure only it was damaged a green bard managed to fix it i was so worried but i’m glad everything is back to normal” said Barbara “A green bard hm..” Y/n felt a strong gust of wind blow her skirt Y/n managed to cover it before y/n flashed anyone “Well i have to get going me and the sisters have are singing by Y/n” said Barbara walking away Y/n greeted everyone she past by Y/n was now at the tavern greeted by a red hair man “Oh Y/n welcome back” said Diluc “Hey diluc the usual please” said Y/n smiling at the man who’s face turned a bit red before nodding going off to serve her drink Y/n looked around the tavern before feeling someone’s presence she turned around seeing a green bard hugging her from behind “Oh Venti great seeing you” said Y/n she felt the boys hot breath on her neck he smiled snuggling closer to Y/n “Venti i need to pay” said Y/n “O-oh yea right sorry!” said Venti turning red “Soo how was liyue” said Venti listening to every word Y/n had to say “I was traveling with Zhongli there was a lot of ruin guards..” said Y/n “o-oh with Z-Zhongli huh” said Venti his eyes glowing he was soon distracted by Y/n’s revealing outfit “Where did you get that outfit?” said Venti “I got it from Xiao isn’t he just a cutie~” said Y/n Venti sighed “H-how about we go travel i missed you so much!” said Venti grabbing Y/n’s hand and leaving forgetting about the wine. Venti was watching Y/n climb when he caught a glimpse of her black lace panties he blushed he got a idea and raised his finger a strong gust of wind blew at Y/n’s skirt flashing him Venti saw Y/n already at the top “Come on Venti let’s get going” said Y/n Venti rubbed his thighs before climbing the stone wall. The two beings walked towards a cabin Venti gulped seeing Y/n’s expression change and saw her smirking “W-wha—“ Venti was pushed down to the floor as Y/n closed the door behind them giving them more privacy “I-is something wrong?..” said Venti Y/n was standing in front of the frighten boy “Oh nothing when i came into mondstadt the wind blew my skirt luckily i stopped it before i flashed anyone or a certain bard.” said Y/n making Venti sweat and start stuttering “And then when i was climbing on top of the stone wall i felt a gust of wind blow me again so tell me Bard why would you do such a pervert thing~” said Y/n the bard blushed and tried speaking but the only thing that came out was a whimper making him cover his mouth quickly and Y/n smirk “You like being called names pervy~” said Y/n the bard quickly protested “Oh ok then i have to get going i have to go to sumeru—“ “n-no please..” whined Venti Y/n bent down to Venti’s level and petted his hair “Tell me little bard what do you want~” said Y/n “Y-you..i n-need you..” said Venti Y/n kissed him making the bard whimper well he’s in trouble.

• You would edge Venti till he’s begging for sweet release

•Venti loved cuddling on your big breast and laying down on them when your edging him he would rest his head on your breast

•Venti also loves groping and sucking on your boobs so expect them to become sensitive

•Venti Loves to cum inside you hoping some day you get knocked up he would always imagine a mini version of him and you running around calling him Papa and you Mama

•Venti also likes breeding you because that means you belong to him and he belongs to you

Aether

Every time you visit Mondstadt you would run into Aether the hero of Mondstadt you would always see Aether do the work of others and Aether always seems tired but Paimon always agreed instead of talking with Aether first. Y/n would always compliment Aether ‘Your such a cutie’ ‘I like your eyes they remind me of my home country’ sometimes Y/n would make dirty jokes when paimon wasn’t around but Aether was to innocent he didn’t understand what those jokes meant Y/n did adored Aethers innocence but sometimes she would get sad that Aether was probably not interested. It was dark outside Y/n was heading to her rented cottage covered in flowers she heard a sound and raised her hand about to use her (vision) skills when she saw Paimon flying towards her “Waaaaa Y/n help Aether is being attacked by a huge monster!” said Paimon her small hand trying to grab Y/n’s she was running being led by Paimon she saw Aether panting and trying to fight off all the Primo Geovishap but soon collapsed injuries all over his body Y/n attacked a geoviship heading their way she walked up to the rest of the geoviship “Get away from him.” said Y/n releasing a powerful attack killing all the geoviship and dropping bones Y/n ran towards Aether checking for a pulse he opened his eyes seeing Y/n “O-oh Y/n~ sooo great to see you..” said Aether his face red “Uh what’s wrong with Aether?..” said Paimon “I-i don’t k—“ Y/n was cut off by Aether wrapping his arms around her neck “Well Uh why don’t you guys stay until Aether is better” said Y/n “Ok..” said Paimon. Y/n was aiding Aether who was asleep she looked at his chubby cheeks and lips she stared at them before leaning in she peck his lips before sighing and kissing him with her tongue “Mhm..” Aether whimpered feeling Y/n kiss him Y/n kept kissing him feeling Aether grow excited “i-i feel something down there..” whimpered Aether Y/n smirked “I’ll help with that baby boy~” said Y/n.

•Aether doesn’t have a clue what he’s doing

•Aether loves your boobs he could sleep on them all day

•Aether loves pleasuring you, want to sit on his face? go ahead!

•Aether cries when overstimulated

•Aether cried when he did something wrong that hurt you also because he was embarrassed (ex: it was aether’s first time fingering you and he accidentally hit the wrong hole if yk)

•Aether loves to cum inside you it gets him excited for some reason

•He gets flustered when you give him a blow job

•He is a submissive boi.

(。-ω-)zzz… well im going to sleep bye bye

[0dde11eth]

The next song they play is toss a coin

Lambert and Eskel the first time Getalt brought Jaskier to Kaer Morhen

[yourheart-inmyhands]

Hiya, I love your yandere archons and a someone else request got an idea brewing in my head. You said the reader can’t be powerful or more because it would make them like the traveler… But what if the reader isn’t even a human? Like a primordial deity/being or something like lovecraft? An eldritch being? Basically a darling who can’t be physically chained or overpowered? How can they charm/persuade the darling? Like trying to seduce Azothoth!like darling, like those scheming yandere they are? Like you know those court drama where the consorts fight for the emperor? Ya know poison, blackmail, etc? That’s the archons for the darling. Is this too complicated? Anyway keep up the good work.

ah this was such an interesting ask! it definitely let me bring out some more obscure head canons of mine so thank you so much! :3c

Warning: this post contains yandere-themes, including delusional behavior, mentions of animal slaughter, uh not much this is actually a pretty tame post, archons are actually kinda nice for once, and other potential topics. Please read at your own risk!

Yandere!Venti would hound you constantly, showing up wherever you seem to be staying to constantly chat you up. At first he starts just straight up begging but slowly it devolves into just chatting, slowly making you fall in love with him as he learns more about you and you him.

You couldn’t help the smile on your face as you saw the familiar green bard bounding over to you, a bottle of wine in his hands and a basket of some human food you had mentioned enjoying. He made sure to always bring something to share with you while you talked, just a little something to keep the conversation going for longer. The bottle of wine was usually for Venti but if you showed interest he wouldn’t mind sharing. Slowly, as he visits you day after day, you find yourself enjoying the presence of the boisterous male. He may have fallen first, but you fell harder.

Yandere!Zhongli would use his history of Liyue to woo you, thrilling I know. This somehow seems to work in his favor though as he can invite you on walks with him and then spend the whole time telling you about the history of the area and all the fun little details. It may seem boring, but somehow the century old dragon seems to make it fun, his passion for history rubbing off on you just a little bit.

You listened intently as Zhongli told you random, generally useless facts about the spot you currently stood at. While you will admit that he had bored you at first, you had come to love his strange little information tidbits. The passion he had for history was admirable and the joyful effect it seemed to have on him rubbed off on you the more he told you. It had started with a simple proposition: join him for a walk and if he told you something you didn’t know, that he could prove was true, then you’d join him for another. If you did know it already, then he would leave you alone. What he didn’t tell you though was that he had no plans of leaving you alone, setting up something that was entirely untrue just to win the little deal. It’s the only time he’s ever lied to you.

Yandere!Raiden would act similarly to male birds, where she flaunts what she’s capable of to entice you to choose her. Though she doesn’t do a silly dance with pretty feathers, instead she showcases her power. She flaunts her capabilities as a partner and uses that to entice you.

While your power as an eldritch being was scaled differently from Raiden, it didn’t mean she couldn’t still showcase her strength to you. Showing you the skeleton of the giant serpent she had slain was only so impressive so instead she challenges you. Bring her anything and she’ll kill it. From wild boar to giant whales, everything you had brought to Raiden she made quick work of. She even offered to dive into the waters and hunt down something herself but you insisted it wasn’t necessary. She had proven herself plenty, you were simply giving her a hard time to see how far she’d go. It almost made you feel bad, killing the insignificant wildlife simply for a bit of a show, but Raiden always made sure the animal went to good use. That was something you liked about her, even if she was busy showing off and flaunting to you, she still made sure that nothing was wasted. 

Yandere!Furina would have nothing to offer but herself. She isn’t incredibly funny, she’s not super strong, she can’t tell you cool facts about her nation or even spend all day talking to you. All she can give you is late nights under the stars, laying there as she points out all the constellations to you. In her early years as the Hydro Archon she would often spend her time stargazing, finding the action perfect to unwind when she was stressed.

Every night, after finishing up with court proceedings for the day, Furina would meet you at the same spot. She’d lay out a blanket, whether you lay on it with her or not, and stare up at the sky. Sometimes she’s silent, just enjoying your presence as a calming figure in her life, and sometimes she’ll point out the constellations to you. Furina thinks you’re absolutely darling but you’re way above her league and she doesn’t have anything that she can use to attract you to her. So she settles for these quiet nights with you, gazing at the stars as she used to in her youth. On nights where she does tell you about the constellations, she tells you how to find it, where the name comes from, and if it applies, the story behind each one. Her favorites are Cassiopeia and Cetus.

[0dde11eth]

Eskel: Does the bard know you like him?

Geralt: I don't know, I've ignored him, I've been mean to him. What else can I do?

Eskel: Sounds like you've tried everything

Geralt: Thank you!

[delta-pavonis]

Dreaming Week 2024 Day 3

Dreamling Week 2024 Day 3 Prompts (from @mr-sadman): solarpunk, painting, meet cute, massage

Dreamling || Rated T || 1093 words

tags (other than the prompts above): fantasy, urban fantasy, solarpunk, drow druid/sorcerer Dream, half wood elf bard/gunsmith Hob, investigator partners with a history, they get captured and held for days as torture, passing mention of biological consequences of being tied to chairs for days on end, confessions

Read Part 1 here. Part 2 here.

(In chronological order, Part 2 comes before Part 1 and this comes after Part 1. Mentions events of Part 1 and events discussed in Part 2.)

“When we get out of this the first thing I am doing is getting a three hour massage, bloody fuck these chains are tight.” Dream tries to twist his wrist to get some wiggle room and can't even manage that; all the movement does is jostle their chairs. His partner whines. “You alright there, Hob?”

They are chained to a pair of chairs, back to back, with heavy steel links. The chains aren't spelled, but they don't need to be when they are this tight: there is no way Dream will pull off even the smallest somatic component restrained like this and Hob certainly can’t play an instrument or draw a gun. Even worse, the room is unnaturally dark.

Dream hadn’t realized how used he had gotten to the sunlight and the greenery of the surfacelands until they were taken from him. For a moment he takes comfort in thoughts of twirling tree branches forming the beams of great towers, arched windows carefully grown in between, columns of elevators going so high they meet the top of the building in the clouds. He thinks of winding streets made of sandstone and brass and overflowing with greenery, the whirring music of solar panels as they track the sunlight along with their flower-kin. 

The thought of the movement of the sun reminds Dream that time has been passing, that they have been in here long enough that he is starting to have trouble tracking time–the only clock he has to go by is his heartbeat and that is only reliable for so long. Hunger has long since passed into a dull ache, which tells him it must be more than a couple days. Both of them have vacated all the remaining volume of foodstuffs left in their digestive tracts, removing another marker of time. 

They have not seen another soul since they awoke here. There is a dim illumination that comes from… somewhere, but Dream cannot pinpoint it. It is only enough to see his own knees by, make out the faintest outline of the large stone blocks of the ceiling that is a mere few feet above their heads. It is not enough for Hob to see anything, dull as his half-human senses are. 

Cruelly enough, water drips from the seams in the stone structure in a few places, landing on the top of their heads, on Hob’s shoulder and chest, on Dream’s cheek. It is the bare minimum to keep them alive and Dream suspects that is very much on purpose.

Dream leans his head back with a sigh and it presses against Hob's. 

“You ever wonder what would have happened if we met under different circumstances?” Hob's speech is slurred enough that it makes Dream reconsider if those arrows they got hit with were a poison targeted for those of the surface. It adds a new layer to the puzzle of who has captured them. “Like, if I wasn't working that night in the tavern, wasn't being the biggest distraction possible?” He is silent for a beat. “I would've asked to join you at your table. Start back up properly, like old friends might. But we’re not friends, are we?” His chuckle is hollow. “No, most definitely not. Perhaps I would’ve tried to woo you with song… paint you a picture with music. Gods, you were so beautiful. Are. So beautiful.”

“Hob…” He doesn't sound like himself, can't possibly be meaning to say any of this. 

“Do you have any idea how badly I want you? Fuck, like all the time. From the very first moment I saw you, when you walked into the Guildhall while I was trying to convince them to hire me. I can even still hear the swissh-click of your airwalker boots on the wooden floor.” Dream can hear him swallow. “It never goes away, you know? This yearning for you. It lives inside me now.”

He closes his eyes and tries to ignore it. Hob cannot be meaning to say this right now and Dream certainly does not want to hear it without Hob’s consent; he is relieved when they lapse into silence once again. 

But it doesn't last.

“If you get a chance to escape, you have to promise me to take it, even if you can't get me out.” Hob’s voice is a threadbare whisper.

No. They can't talk like this. He won't have it. “Hob, you’re-”

“I am not delirious and I am not talking nonsense!” He is panting now and Dream swears he can hear Hob's racing heartbeat. It is another piece of evidence that he is not himself. “Promise me, Dream. Promise me you will save yourself if you have the chance, even at my expense.”

“No.” Absolutely not. Dream's answer is immediate and brooks no argument; he won't even consider it. The idea is anathema, like teaching the Druidic language outside of a Circle or attempting to unbalance Nature itself. “I will not leave without you.” 

Hob’s breath rate is increasing, pushing into hyperventilating, and his voice is unsteady as a newborn foal’s legs. He sounds almost on the verge of tears and it makes something in Dream’s heart crack. “Please, Dream! I need you to promise me.”

He grits his teeth hard enough to make them squeak. “I will make no such vow.” Dream growls. It is harsh, he knows, but he will also not lie to Hob. Not after everything they’ve been through. 

They never got a chance to talk about it, what lay implied between them from their adventure with that soul-swapping curse. Not properly. Not before this case, which pretty much immediately went tits up. Fuck, they should have spoken about it. 

Dream adds this to his long ledger of regrets.

When Hob speaks again the words are clearly forced through a rising tide of panic. “I need to know you’ll be safe, that y-” 

“Breathe Hob. We don’t need to plan-”

“Promise me!” he sobs. “I need to know you wi-”

That something in Dream breaks.

“I will not leave without my Mate!”

For a moment the only sound in the small room is Hob’s panting, then Dream lets his head fall back; this time it lands on Hob’s shoulder with a dull whump.

“You were right. What you felt during the curse.” Dream closes his eyes. “I am sorry I didn’t tell you. I just… we were… we’ve been…”

Hob turns his head, twists his shoulders, as much as possible, until his nose nudges the point of Dream’s ear. “Stupid. We’ve been truly. Amazingly. Stupid.”

[dragon-chica]

Simon Aumar and his Bard

Fandom: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

Summary: Simon with a bard reader who keeps flirting with him, but he doesn't think they're being honest about it.

Very early on from meeting Simon, you decided he would be the one. There was just something about a clumsy sorcerer full of snark and "woe is me" that grabbed your attention.

That first conversation you used the oldest trick in the bard book and asked if he would be your muse.

He gave you an odd look, completely lost on your charming tone.

"I'd rather you didn't, enough people already know of my blunders."

Very well.

As a bard, and a good one at that, you figured making your feelings known would be simple. Right? Smooth talking, flirts, and seduction are what you're known for! Besides music of course.

You did not happen to take into consideration Simon's levels of self-hatred and low self esteem.

But! No matter, you are determined to woo and win over the object of your affections.

Somehow. Eventually.

While Simon's approach to courting is formally asking permission to do so, yours is with more flare. Pizazz.

Like offering to buy him a drink, which at first he went to decline, but figured Edgin would saddle him with the rest of the bill and thanked you for the assistance. The flirting aspect completely going over his head.

No matter, you've got this.

Once on a job, Edgin had the brilliant plan of needing someone to pose as a married couple.

You volunteered Simon and yourself immediately.

He was full of blunders the entire evening but you charmed anyone who came by, telling them about your husband and relationship (hinting to how it could be.)

And at the end of the night linked your arm with his to go celebrate a job well done and told him "We made a pretty good couple, eh Darling?" which you called him all through the con.

Heat rushed to the tips of his ears and he very pointedly ignored your comment. You take that as a good sign and tug him along.

You crack and decide to ask him, officially, if he'd be willing to let you court him. Doric tells you to also give a list of "reasons you'd be a suitable spouse" like he did for her.

"Very funny, I get it. Thanks for doing your research." He thinks you're joking, mocking his rejection and refuses to hear you out.

Always walking or riding alongside him so you can chat, often complimenting him on his magic or anything else, from his cute smile to his pointed ears.

He tends to roll his eyes and tell you to quit playing around, and walk a little faster. But you match his speed again and he accepts defeat.

When you outright flirt with him, from cheesy words to raunchy pick up lines, he will go from flustered to irritated at you for 'practicing on him' and stomp away.

It's painfully obvious to everyone else how smitten you are with the sorcerer, and they try to assist you.

The tavern you're staying at "not having enough rooms" and suddenly you and Simon MUST stay in a room together. That happens to only have one bed. (Thank you Edgin.)

You write ballads and sing your little thoughts about him through the day, and still he is completely unaware of your feelings.

"They do that about all of us, it doesn't mean anything."

"They literally have never done that for anyone but you." - Doric

Finally being exasperated and just kissing him after a skin of your teeth success in battle, slamming your lips to his once and for all and if it ends in rejection to be it, but he'd better understand.

He takes far too long to realize what you've done and attempts to kiss back but you're already pulling away, not noticing how he tries to follow your lips.

You await his response, bracing for the worst while he just stares bewildered until Holga shouts at him to do something.

"You like me." his eyes are wide, and breathless. "YOU LIKE ME?"

"Yeah. I've been pretty clear about that."

"SINCE WHEN?"

"Literally the first time I saw you. And mentioned it almost every day since."

He's flabbergasted. Stunned silent. Takes a punch on the shoulder to even get him walking again.

On the way back, covered in grime from battle and thoroughly in need of some rest and healing he falls in line beside you, usually what you do to him.

"Does this mean-" his voice cracks and he clears his throat "Does this mean that we would be- do we court each other now? Are you interested in that? Have terms to the idea of it?"

You've won the war so now you get to be irritated with him too. "I don't know Simon, are we? You didn't seem to keen on allowing me to do so before."

[lacedupforyou]

ℭ𝔬𝔪𝔭𝔢𝔱𝔦𝔱𝔬𝔫|Yandere Diluc | Yandere Kaeya

( No Inc!st Obviously. Reader is a knight for mondstat. Reader also has a hydro vision). ( Part 2 to this)

From the start you had always been Hardworking, Crafty, But just as gentle. It was no wonder you had become an official knight of Favonius. Using your vision to help others and becoming quite popular in Mondstat.

You had made many friends in Mondstat, From Wolf boys to outriders. It was like everyone knew you. Of course the calvary captain tried to catch your eye and woo you but you were so hardworking you didn't seem to have any time for small flirts.

You were out with the bard listening to his drunken tunes. When the time came for the bill, Master diluc arguing with the heavily drunk Venti to pay his tab. You told him you would pay for it. Stating you detest violence and arguments. Your kindness and selflessness intriguing master diluc. You introduced yourself to him. "If you ever need my help I'd be happy to help you anywhere you need me!"

Something struck him, Like the electro archon sending her fury to diluc in that instance. Diluc had to excuse himself from how friendly cute you were in the moment. A blush spread over his features complimenting his fiery features.

The next day you were invited to the angel's share with rosaria and kaeya. he had promised to settle your bill and after paying for venti's tab how could you refuse?

Walking in you were greeted with a blank faced stare from diluc. And kaeya and rosaria following behind you into the tavern. All 3 of you had ordered drinks and began talking about simple things, laughing, gossiping, and all.

Diluc had been watching you from afar, Watching your expressions change from laughter, shock, and that same soft smile he found himself frozen in. But the way his brother had his arm around you how close he was with you bothered him. He decided to do something about that.

"Y/N I could use your assistance right now."

"I shall help you Sir Diluc" Rosaria replies getting up from her seat.

"I need the assistance of a true knight thank you." He retorts

"It's no trouble rosaria I can help Master Diluc" You smile and arise from your seat to the back to help him.

You almost missed the glare from kaeya and the smirk diluc had given him. You walked to the back to help him move some crates of wine around (He didn't really need them moved he just needed some excuse to have you so close.) "I appreciate your help Y/n. You seem very well known around mondstat, I find your adventures quite alluring. Perhaps you could write me letters of them." He gathers his courage to speak those words hoping for the best.

"Like Pen-Pals? I'd love to! Send me a letter anytime! I'll tell you tons of stuff!" You smile up at him and he almost loses himself again. You write down your address and walk back to kaeya who seemed to be anticipating your return. The night continued full of laughs and more gossip. Then came your tab.

"It's my treat Y/n, I'm the one taking you out." Kaeya smirks over to diluc and takes out his purse of mora.

"Y/n it's MY treat I'll pay for it, Consider it a gift for becoming MY pen pal." Diluc replies semi-harshly

The words send kaeya to make remarks on diluc's faults for diluc to snap back into a full blown argument. Rosaria sighs take your arm and pulls you outside the tavern. "What a night, I shall be the one to walk you home Y/n, Consider it a treat." She smiles and you happily walk off with her into the night. She waves you off and you sleep happily.

You wake that morning to see a letter from Diluc. Your heart flutters from his gorgeous handwriting and his quick timing to already send you a letter. You open it and it says :

"Dearest Y/n I apologize for the previous night and my immature actions. I hope you got home safely in the night. We have a new product coming in from Sumeru, I'd love you to sample it. - Best Regards, Diluc "

You feel incredible, He wished you well and invited you to freely try some new product! What a lovely invitation! But you had training with kaeya today.. The invitation will have to wait, Your job as a knight comes first!

You had sparred with kaeya for awhile, Practicing your hydro vision and watching his cryo in action.

"You're holding your sword wrong Y/n here let me show you." Kaeya says

He comes behind you gripping your hands and arms moving them slowly with his. The distance between you two non existent. He felt lost in the moment and you could feel yourself freeze up as he guided your fingers along the blade. Your embrace was warm and it felt incredible. You swiftly collected himself you continued to train with him. 

You wrote a letter back to diluc and went to bed exhausted that night.

Little did you know The Dark Knight and the Calvary Captain were both watching from afar. Watching your peaceful sleeping face from a safe distance. Watching you undress and fall asleep. They felt infatuated by your grace. They knew they'd have to worry about the other brother. But they will make sure you are there's in the end.

Ⓣⓗⓔⓡⓔ'ⓢ ⓝⓞ ⓔⓢⓒⓐⓟⓔ

[theladyofmanyfandomsfanfiction]

Whoreson Prison Blues

Pairing: Jaskier x Reader (Ft. Geralt)

Warnings: Violence, language.

Inspiration: Season 2

Summary: Imprisoned and alone you find yourself bonding with your cell mate only to realise that this wasn’t a mere stranger.

It wasn’t exactly how you planned the day to go but there weren’t any regrets. Being beaten and thrown into a cell was a common occurrence recently, in fact you still had bruising from the last entanglement with the knighted patrols.

The third day had nearly passed and a guard tossed a small bowl of water into the cell which spilled onto the floor. He jeered through the barred doors and then turned away when he heard a commotion. To you, it sounded like two guards struggling to detain another unfortunate individual.

“Well, well. Looks like you have a friend.” The duty guard chuckled and then disappeared from sight to open the cell door on the opposite side of the brick wall. There was a harsh shove and somebody hitting their knees on the floor.

“Maybe this will make you think twice about helping the elf-bastards.” A second guard laughed.

The cell doors slammed and you heard the keys jangle as the lock was fastened. Still cackling, all three sounded like they were jesters and decided to walk out and celebrate their win privately. This worked in your favour allowing you to plan an escape until you heard a small mumble through the crack in the wall.

“Reminder to self, file a complaint for these hideous cells. Oh, great - an audience of rats.” The voice sighed.

You didn’t know why but the stranger made you smile. “The rats are pretty decent company.”

“That’s funny. I had a friend who would have said something like that. They were a real badass. We used to travel with this broody, moody, muscled fellow who liked to act complicated.”

Hold on. Now that you listened to the voice more carefully, it began to match a face that you hadn’t seen in months.

“Jaskier?”

“…Yes?” The bard replied. “Who’s asking?”

“Y/n - you wonderful singing fool!”

“And how do I know that you’re who you say you are and not some trick by the guards to lure out information?”

You rolled your eyes but commended that he was being more aware of people in strange lands. The bard used to be far too trusting.

“Julian Alfred Pankratz, Viscount of Lettenhove. Original composer of Toss A Coin To Your Witcher. You have a tendency to woo married women - even tried your luck with me too. You tried to kiss me after getting drunk in Cintra and then again when we were dealing with that werewolf-“

“Okay, you’ve made your point. I can’t believe you’re here. What are the chances?” Jaskier wondered aloud. “What have they got you in here for?”

You paused for a silent second and stared at the metal cuffs around your wrists. It was probably best not to get into detail about what you had done to wind up on the hate radar of this town.

“Better question, what are you in for?“ You deflected.

Thankfully, Jaskier didn’t hesitate to answer and if he was curious, he chose not to follow up on it. He let out a long sigh and you could imagine the look on his face.

“I helped a wanted criminal escape.”

You laughed at the idea of the humble bard being involved in something so prickly. Jaskier didn’t appreciate the reaction and there was a scoff. “It’s true! I’m very close with the Sandpiper.”

The Sandpiper was a name not loudly spoken, so you figured that he wasn’t telling tall tales.

“Alright, I believe you. You’ve been wandering very interesting circles. The Bard and the Piper - you must tell me of the stories one day.” You smiled and rest your head against the stone wall.

Your stomach began to rumble just as the main doors swung open and two guards walked in. You heard a metal tray clattering and recognised that it was the final meal of the day. When the guard approached your cell, you watched as he entered and carelessly tossed the tray down. You had refused to eat anything that was given in fear that it had been poisoned by one of the many people you had pissed off.

You could hear Jaskier trying to salvage what hadn’t touched the floor and was about to tell the guard to jump off a cliff when a round ball of stale bread flew and hit you in the face quite harshly. It rolled off your lap and settled on some hay. You turned to the guard and glared daggers.

“Eat that or get a taste of my blade.” He threatened.

With a huff, you chose to ignore the guards presence all together. It wasn’t long before he left and you took up the measly portion that was more dirt than bread and tore off a piece.

“This isn’t so bad.” Jaskier commented. “Could use some seasoning.”

You stared at what you were eating and wondered if it was hard enough to concuss the guard on duty…

“So how’s the broody fellow?” Jaskier wondered.

At first, you frowned but then remembered who he was referring to. The Witcher who took a lot of patience.

“I don’t know. We parted ways not long after you left. He was being increasingly difficult so I told him as much.”

“How did he take that?” Jaskier wondered, knowing exactly how the man could behave.

You exhaled. “He told me to ‘fuck off’ and left me in a swamp.”

The memory of that day was leaving a bitter taste in your mouth…or maybe it was the bread. Either way, you didn’t want to clutter your mind with something useless.

Jaskier seemed to have silently agreed.

“Well, screw Geralt. We don’t need him.” He said and began tapping on some spoons.

There was a loud clang against the cell bars as the guard slammed his palm across it to get the attention of them both.

“Will you both shut up? You sound like fucking spurned lovers.”

Jaskier laughed at the thought and you were glad that he was fated to be your cell partner. As the guard piped down, the rats scurried over to the bards cell where the spoons clanged a little louder and with a bit more rhythm until Jaskier had a catchy tune.

“It's been a long time travellin'

On roads that lead to nowhere

With hopes and dreams that always rot…” he began to sing softly, pausing every so often to form the artful words.

You waited for the next bit but he seemed to have a bit of a block. Without thinking, you leaned back and looked at your surroundings.

“Sometimes it takes a prison cell to remember how shitty the world is.”

“Oh, that’s perfect!” Jaskier told you and began tapping again.

“Sometimes it takes a prison cell,

The tricks and tales, the traitors' tell,

To help you see that freedom is all you've got.

So lock me up and sock me up,

And throw away the key.

Go fuck yourself, you whoreson.

'Cause you're through fuckin' with me.”

Jaskier was a bard of many talents and you had missed him all because of a falling out with a mutual friend. It must have been the exhaustion of being locked up that you started singing along to the song just to keep occupied.

“Go fuck yourself, you whoreson! Cause you’re through fuckin’ with me.”

A few more rehearsals and you and Jaskier had the duty guards on edge each time you switched shifts. They might be brutes but you couldn’t help but credit their creativity with the death threats.

Another day passed, you were still locked up, Jaskier was now doing solo renditions for the rats, and the bread hadn’t improved in taste or quality. You began to think of a way out of the cell and devised the start of a plan that included stealing the keys with Jaskier’s help. It wouldn’t be easy but if you got your hands on a sword, the guards would be unmatched in skill.

Then, there was an unexpected commotion in the hallway during Jaskier’s song.

“Fucking hell. You know what? We’re trying to rehearse in here.”

You heard the bard complain and then apologise to the rats for the interruption. “Good sir. You would not know talent if I shoved it up your … Geralt.”

You scoffed to yourself and wondered if Jaskier had finally gone mad. “I thought we agreed never to mention that broody grouch ever again?” You called out.

There was silence to the question and some soft talking that you couldn’t quite understand but Jaskier’s voice rose for a second. Then there was a shuffle of feet and you were drawn to your own cell door where a familiar man with white hair and broad shoulders showed his face.

Geralt unlocked you door and walked in. He bent down and worked his Witcher magic to free you of the cuffs.

“I’d say I’m shocked to find you here - but I’m not.” He said, helping his friend up.

You rubbed your wrists and dusted your pants. You looked at the man and shrugged. “You know how it is - chaos doesn’t just come in the form of magic.”

Geralt smiled and you couldn’t help but notice that something was a little different about him - like he was content, almost happy.

“I have no right to ask this of you but I could use your help.” He requested.

You could very easily have told him to shove off and be rid of the man for the rest of your life but Geralt was a friend through so many difficult quests. Plus it wouldn’t hurt charge him the fee of one apology.

“Just to be clear, I’m pissed at you for about a million things but I can’t resist a call for help.” You told him honestly and raised a finger. “One condition, Jaskier comes along.”

As if on cue, the bard walked in. “Say no more, I have no plans to leave. Oh…” his eyes travelled to the locks and chains laying on the floor. “Why the fuck were you chained up?”

Clearing your throat, you pointed to the exit. “Story for the road?”

Masterlist here

[between-the-realms]

A Tavern Well Kept

@the-mysticandmodern-world

Arcadia, a young tiefling Bard woman, was in the middle of a city tavern. She was on the stage with her Lyre, and with a couple of other local bards. This specific tavern was close to the local adventuring guild, so their were all sorts of sorry folk sitting around and drinking or going to attempt to woo the barkeeps for the night.

Arcadia was a slender tiefking woman, with pink and blue hair, her horns were only starting to begin to curl around her ears. She didn't consider herself an adventurer, she only wished to get by and survive her life. The issue was, that when someone showed that they needed help, she had a bad habit to start sticking her nose where it didn't belong. She was a kind hearted soul who had a knack for getting into trouble, weather she wanted to or not. It's how she ended up with this gig in the first place.

Currently, they were playing a jaunty tune, one of the other bard's singing about some man from an old story slaying a dragon to protect his love. While playing her lyre, Arcadia would also softly whistle to add to the tune.

[hardboiledleggs]

Sneeze Hairybuns the Bard

Quick Steddie oneshot based on this post by @sharpbutsoft - Fair warning this probably won't be accurate to the D&D version they play in the show because I have the most experience with 5e and can't be bothered to look up the other editions for a tiny little ficlet like this lol. Also the poem Steve reads is "To Live Of Love" by St. Therese of Lisieux. Let me know if you'd like to be added to my permanent Steddie fic tag list :)

"D&D is Eddie's love language, Steve. You can't just Farrah Fawcett your way into his heart like you're used to doing."

Steve frowns at Dustin, causing his eyebrows to pull together.

"First off, the Fawcett Method is tried and true, don't you dare knock it. Secondly, I have literally never touched that game, how am I supposed to woo him with something I suck at?" His fingers are twisting furiously in his hair as he paces around his friend.

"Then we'll pick something you won't suck at," Dustin crows, wiggling his eyebrows. "You, Steve Harrington, will play a bard!"

"You know I don't know what that is," Steve grumbles in a flat tone. He wants to kick himself for ever having started this conversation in the first place, but even if this is a total dead-end, at least Dustin will stop trying to get him to confess his undying love for Robin.

Dustin is already rummaging through his unbelievably cluttered desk and emerges with several sheets of paper and a pencil that he has absolutely chewed the eraser off of.

"Dude, I am not fucking using your snack pencil! What the fuck did you do to that thing?"

The younger boy rolls his eyes and finds a different pencil, thankfully unchewed, and Steve grabs everything and sits on the floor with a huff.

"Fine, tell me what to do. You better not make me look stupid, Henderson. I still have that baseball bat in my car."

Steve jumps to his feet when he hears a car door slam outside. He has spent the last hour sitting on his couch and picking a nervous hole through one of the couch cushions. He makes a mental note to flip that cushion over before his parents come home next and opens his front door, bowing extravagantly to Eddie and the rest of the Party.

"Alright nerds, let's get this shit started!" Eddie squawks as he bounces through the door and shoves past Steve. "Remember kiddos, piss now because you lose two hit points every time you take a bathroom break!"

The kids file in behind him with El and Max bringing up the rear. Steve grins at the two of them.

"Don't you worry, ladies, I made snacks."

"They better not be pretzels again," Max sniffs as she drags El into the kitchen, El waving at Steve as they pass. He shuts the door and takes a deep breath, shuffling his feet on the tiled floor before following the boys into the living room where he had set up a passable D&D table.

Steve picks his way between the chairs and sweaty teenage boys to take a seat on Eddie's right, directly across from Dustin. He peers at Eddie from under his eyelashes as the Dungeon Master shuffles through his papers and jots down a few last-minute notes. Steve tries (and fails) to ignore the way Eddie's shirt is riding up and exposing his hipbones. Dustin coughs, but it sounds suspiciously like the word "Slut!" and Steve glares at him before letting his gaze fall to the character sheet he and Dustin had worked on last week.

"Alright, are we all ready?" Eddie asks as everyone files in and takes their seats. A general murmur of assent filters through the room, and Steve fights down the nausea that has suddenly crawled into his throat.

"Weary travelers! We have a new face amongst our number," Eddie begins with vigor. "Steve here will be playing..." He nudges Steve with an elbow and he jumps.

"Oh, uh, I am an elven bard named Sneeze Hairybuns." Steve fights the urge to glare at Dustin, who is giggling with Lucas across the table. "I was orphaned when I was ten and lived off the streets with just a guitar to try to make money."

"Excellent!" Eddie says, ignoring Dustin. "Let us begin."

Eddie begins to paint a picture with just his words. Steve finds himself utterly entranced with him: the way his eyes sparkle, the curve of his mouth around the word "dragon," and how sinful his hands looked as he drummed his fingers restlessly on the table and fidgeted with his dice. He's pretty sure his mouth is gaping like a damn fish when Eddie turns to him, and he snaps it shut quickly.

"Sneeze, what do you want to do? You can talk to anyone in the tavern, investigate anything you think is suspicious, or anything else you can think of."

Steve makes eye contact with Dustin, who nods, and turns back to Eddie. "I go up to the bartender to talk to him."

"Hello, young traveler. Can I offer you a strong glass of mead? We just did our monthly washing of the glasses so it should taste better than usual," Eddie barks in a gruff voice very different from his own. Steve tamps down on his anxious butterflies and leans casually against the table as if it was a bartop.

"Hiya, handsome. I think I can think of someone that sounds a little better than mead. Care to give me a taste?" Steve purrs in a sultry tone, puncturing his words with a rather gratuitous wink.

There is a chorus of whoops and "GROSS, Steve!" from around the table, but Steve keeps his eyes on Eddie. His face is rapidly changing colors, going from a pale pink to a deep almost-burgundy in less than five seconds as he chokes on the Coke he'd been in the middle of sipping from. Dustin stands up to give him a few thwacks on his back, shooting Steve a wink as he does so and mouthing "Exactly like that!" behind Eddie's back.

Eddie sucks in a deep breath with his eyes resolutely fixed on the table in front of him. His voice sounds much more like the usual Eddie as he replies, "Flattery will get you nowhere with me, traveler. What brings you and your companions to my tavern?"

"We're looking for information on the dragon that is terrorizing your village," Mike interrupts, scooting his minifigure toward the bar on Eddie's map. Eddie turns to him in relief and regales their group with tales of a monstrous beast that has been killing their livestock and kidnapping their children, and Steve shoots an anxious glance at Dustin. The younger boy shoots him a subtle thumbs up and turns back to Eddie.

Much of the game continues in this fashion. After the third or fourth time Steve opens the Party's dialogue with an NPC with a disgustingly-cheesy line about getting lost in their eyes or attempting to roll to seduce them, Erica throws her hands up and cries, "My gods, Sneeze, you can't flirt your way through a dragon fight!"

Dustin cackled, earning himself a smack on the back of the head from Max, who was observing while she devoured the bowl of popcorn she and El were passing back and forth.

"Says you, Sinclair. Our Dungeon Master hasn't stopped me yet. Speaking of, I believe I still have an action this turn?" Steve turns to Eddie, whose face has remained bright red throughout most of the campaign. Eddie nods once without looking at him.

"In that case, I would like to perform a poem I wrote for the Light Fairy." He clears his throat.

"To live of love, it is to know no fear. No memory of past faults can I recall. No imprint of my sins remaineth here. The fire of love divine effaces all. O sacred flames! O furnace of delight! I sing my safe sweet happiness to prove, in these mild fires I dwell by day, by night. I live of love!"

Steve, of course, hadn't actually written any poetry for this, but he'd read this poem in an English textbook his senior year and had liked it enough to tear it out and keep it. Mike wolf-whistles, and Dustin shoots another conspicuous wink toward Steve, but Steve hardly notices. Their Dungeon Master looks like his head might just spontaneously combust.

"Bathroom break!" Eddie's voice cracks through an entire octave as he shoots out of his seat and shuffles toward the stairs. His footsteps thump above their heads as he takes the steps three at a time.

"Maybe I'd better..." Steve trails off as he hops up and follows him. "Don't break anything or pee on the walls while I'm gone, please."

Ignoring the scuffle that immediately breaks out behind him, Steve jogs up the stairs and stops in front of the closed bathroom door. He can hear the water running inside, but not much else. Steeling himself, he knocks once and murmurs, "Hey, Eds? You alright?"

A hasty shuffling sound escapes under the door before it opens slightly, revealing a very pink-faced and ruffled Eddie Munson. Steve, mentally cursing whatever gods allowed him to think Dustin's plan wouldn't be a complete disaster, rubs the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Why are you doing this to me? Did Little Sinclair put you up to this? Because whatever she told you, it isn't true, and honestly this is just the tiniest bit cruel because I don't ev-hhrmmMPH!"

Whatever Eddie was planning on saying is lost as Steve grabs him by the hips and shoves him backward against the ugly yellow sink before pressing their mouths together. Eddie's hands flutter uselessly against Steve's chest before finally winding their way into his ridiculous, puffy hair with a broken moan that Steve swallows greedily into his own mouth. Steve presses him further back into the counter, needing to be closer, needing to feel Eddie, and peppers his lips and his throat with kisses and bites and little licks that are driving both of them insane.

Steve gathers a handful of Eddie's curly hair and yanks his head back, giving him uninterrupted access to Eddie's throat and collarbones, which he wastes no time in completely covering with purpling lovebites. Eddie is grinding against him, hands still in Steve's hair, making the most obscene noises Steve has ever heard in his life. Neither can slow down long enough to catch their breath, and their needy pants and gasps of air are filling the room with heat.

It's only when Eddie registers the sound of footsteps on the stairs that the two men break apart in a panic. Eddie is trying desperately to arrange his curls to cover his neck and Steve is still adjusting the collar of his shirt when Will rounds the corner. He looks at them for one beat, two beats, then turns on his heel and walks back down the stairs, shouting to the rest of the group that it'll just be another second.

Breathing hard, they just stare at each other for a few seconds. Eddie is, for once, completely speechless, and Steve is just too dumbfounded that Henderson's stupid plan had worked to form a coherent thought. Eddie is the one to break the silence.

"Right-o. Cool. I'll just head back to the game, shall I?"

Steve stares after him completely dumbfounded. He gives himself another few seconds to will his traitorous body into submission before following. It takes about 10 seconds after he sits down for Dustin to make eye contact with him, and Steve tries his best to keep his face neutral, but-

"I KNEW IT! You owe me BIG, Harrington!"

"I knew it, too, you dweeb! I told Eddie like, two entire months ago to make his move. You're not special, Dustybuns," Erica snorts.

Steve sighs and puts his head in his hands, but he still locks his ankle around Eddie's under the table as he tries halfheartedly to fight the secret, pleased smile that's making its way to his face. He can't see it, but Eddie wears the exact same smile.

Tag list - @aghostcup @ask-canon-and-fanon-personified @brassreign (you said you wanted to see anything of mine that was Steddie so no take-backs)

[bananasfosterparent]

Playthrough Updates #4

(is it actually #4? I honestly don't know lmao let's say it is)

🌊Silkina the Waveservant Bard

Silkina has gotten to the Underdark safely and is currently on her way to visit the mushies! Nothing super exciting has happend that's worth mentioning, but I did finally do a photoshoot with her and Wyll which was very fun. I also downladed a pirate outfits mod and so she has a few new outfits and accessories that are ocean themed! I also changed her outfit to the wavemother dress but an alt version of it. I wish it didn't clip weirdly at the arm pits, but what can ya do?

✨Solenia the Drow Cleric of Elistraee

Solenia and Silkina are in the exact same spot lol Well, Solenia is a little further along and at Grymforge!

The biggest change is that I decided to have fun with Solenia's hair lmao I have a cool anime-ish, Final Fantasy-esque hair mod that had this spiky pontail situation and I really wanted to use it for someone. Solenia felt like a good choice lmao She's still not exactly romancing anyone atm but she'll probably go for Halsin depending on how that all goes!

She's very adamant about saving the slaves in the Underdark and helping the gnomes and it's my first time really doing that, so woo! Oh she also saved Bolen which was a first for me lmao Usually Efenity just blows up the whole area and steals the stuff that was in his bag 🥲

🌩️Efenity the Storm Sorcerer

Changed her hair and outfit YET. AGAIN. I just have to accept that I will never not change it every couple of days lmaooo

Anyway, she's the furthest along out of everyone because she's my comfort Tav and I get lost in her playthroughs 🥲yes the playthroughs with my Evil Tav being the worst person alive are somehow my comfort playthroughs... I don't get it either. Plus, I kinda follow a "routine" with her since I have a storyline she goes through, so it's familiar after doing it 6 times and still never getting past the final fight.

She has gone through the gauntlet of Shar, the whole shadow cursed lands, fought and defeated Yurgir and his minions, and I left off with her and Astarion getting the news about his scars from Raphael.

I love this conversation because it's one of the first moments Efenity's perspective on Astarion's situation can be directly acted out/spoken. She's always like "SO... there's a way to become a living vampire. Jot that down cause we are coming back to that. Cazedor is a POS and we gon' take him down."

🍃Enyana the Dryad (wood elf Druid)

Enyana's a little behind the others, but she JUST got to the Underdark! And I mean JUST got there.

She saved Halsin and I've been enjoying her and Gale a lot.

There's a sort of timid but curious vibe between them (at least, in my head lmao) that makes me happy. Can't wait to get to more romance scenes with him!